Parable of the Two Sons Matthew 21:28-32

Parable of the Two Sons Matthew 21:28-32

In the Parable of the Two Sons the thing that most stands out to me is actually nothing that is written down. It is the fact that we have nothing written that makes it stand out. You see, it is the father’s non-response that I first notice in this parable. The father asks the son to go to the field, and the son says no. The father does not respond to the no, nor say ‘thank you, son’ to the second.

The father’s silence

Is this non-response because the father is withholding judgement until the end? Is it because he knows his sons and they do not always do what they say they will do? But why not praise the one for a good decision and instruct the other in the bad? Why not ask the one who says no if he has other priorities? I imagine that the father smiles and pats each son on the shoulder, sending him on his way. We are simply told nothing of his response. I think I would be inclined to respond vocally. Wouldn’t you? I can hear it now, ‘What do you mean, no! You are part of this family and as such your contribution to the running of the family business is necessary!’, or something similar.

Then we have the sons. The first son says he will not work in the vineyard yet does. He has promised nothing but delivers much. The second says he will work but, does not. Both of these responses are aberrant to me. I expect word and deed to follow one another. I’m learning that my expectations on work ethic are not the same as others, but the lack of coherent word and deed really does get my goat (ha, never really thought I’d use that phrase!).

Patient Father

Here though, we have a patient father. The father who has not chastised nor praised the sons. The father leaves it all to the end. He doesn’t try to control the sons’ words or actions. Oh boy. I think that hits home. How often have I tried to ensure that things go just the way I want or expect? How often have I queried and tried to understand the motivation of the answer in order to change it?

Trusting God or controlling outcomes

Neither son instills trust. Yet, we who instruct others are to trust in the Lord, that the Lord will guide and speak to those that work with us, for us, and grow up under us. It is this trust in the Lord which will give us the trust necessary to let go of the lecture or praise. We have experienced the shame and guilt ourselves and know that they are lessons themselves. There is no need add a verbal assault to that lesson from our sense of shame or guilt. The praise we give might be uplifting, but in this case, we would have praised a decision in which the action was not carried out. The final result is known only at the end.

We often stop and evaluate progress, how far we are in achieving goals or if we are doing a good job. But, if we are honest with ourselves, we know that there are still many things that may happen before something is finished. External or internal influences, other priorities, and even changes in goals may lead us to not finish or delay significantly. What matters in the end, is if we have followed the requests of the father in our lives, in our field of work. If we have done this, we will finish strong and please the father.

I can’t control others

Maybe this will help us, help me, not sweat the small stuff so much. Maybe I’ll step back a bit more now, and let others do what they will do. Each son controls himself; I cannot control him; and the Father allows that free will. The control over the small stuff and over what others are doing will kill me quickly. I really do need to keep the end goal in mind, finishing the race strong. Paul says in 2 Timothy 4:7 (NIV) ‘I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.’

Fighting the good fight; this is the son who overcomes his hesitance or rebellion and obeys the father. There is a personal element of laying down our own life and desires, to pick up the cross. This is what the first son does, maybe the second will one day. I cannot foist the treasure of Christ upon someone, they have to discover it through the Holy Spirit. No-one led that man to the field to find the treasure, the merchant was hunting for a pearl. I cannot nag someone into the kingdom, nor can I nag them into working the fields.

Fight the good fight

Fighting the good fight, for me today, means that I have fought the sin nature within me to control things and people. Fighting the sin nature that tries to put me before Jesus. My desires and what I want must come behind what God wants for me. The more I know him, the more my desires will reflect his desires for me. Win-win! But everyday I have to choose that, I have to choose him. I have to repent in my sin and choose the path God set for me. Running the race means making sure we have run the race that is set for us by God, not my own path. And not someone else’s path. He asked the sons to work in the vineyard, not the wine press. He asks and we choose how to respond, the if and when.

Daily follow Him

The sons made choices all throughout the day. We too have choices to follow or disobey. Just as the Israelites did. Why I am thinking of the snakes that ran through the camp in Numbers 21, I don’t know. They were following God but found it too hard and began to grumble and complain about the leadership, trek, food, and water. Nothing was going their way. God saw their hearts and sorted them. The snakes gave them enough time to repent and turn from the sin, turn from the wrong decisions and sinful thoughts. We have a choice to respond for God or against God, not just daily, or once, but minute by minute.

This post has been updated and revised from the Parables of Matthew series from August 2019.

Run your own race parable of 2 sons.png